THE MINI-SKIRT SPEAKS:
|
|
By Don W. Hillis
I want to make it clear
that I am a Christian miniskirt. That is, I go to church every Sunday. What's
more, I attend an evangelical Church. Of course, I am not the only Christian
miniskirt in town. There are many others who go to my church.
Though we represent a
variety of colors and patterns there is one thing we
have in common. We all have a way of revealing attractive thighs, especially
when the legs are crossed. They tell me that's the
most comfortable way to sit.
Unless I am misreading the
situation we seem to make our wearers a bit self-conscious. At least the girl
who wears me is always tugging at my hem. Though I am not an expert on human
nature, this appears to indicate some kind of complex.
I have also noted that we
miniskirts have the ability to attract a good deal of masculine attention even
at church. At first I took pride in the fact that men are fascinated by my
pattern and color design. However, just this morning I heard the preacher say
that this was not really what the young men (some not so young) were looking
at. Though I was all ears when he started to preach, "The Appeal Of A Miniskirt," I was embarrassed before he was
through.
He claimed that the
miniskirt does not appeal to the aesthetic. According to him, there are dozens
of other dresses more beautiful than I am. His blanket statement that
miniskirts do not make an aesthetic, academic, economic, moral, or spiritual
contribution to their wearers left me with a feeling that I was not such a
great Christian after all.
He said the only appealing
thing about me was my appeal to the flesh. Then he spoke for ten minutes on the
carnality of human nature. He publicly accused me of contributing to the lust
of the flesh. I felt a hard tug on my hem when he said that!
You could have heard a pin
drop in the sanctuary when he quoted the following statement from Kerry Elliott:
"To flaunt sexuality
in public is a betrayal of your femininity, not an endorsement. It is like
playing the tuba on the subway to prove that you are a musician.
"It isn't honest to
expose a man to the aroma of steak and apple pie..., and then accuse him of
being a glutton because he licks his lips." I think everyone got the
point.
I really blushed when he
began asking questions about what we miniskirts did when we were out in the
work-a-day world. He wondered what we thought our testimony amounted to in the
presence of men who couldn't care less about feminine purity. He said it
doesn't take much to trigger a man's thought in the direction of sex. That's
why Jesus said, "He that looketh on a woman to lust after her bath already
committed adultery in his heart."
The preacher claimed that
there is nothing about a miniskirt that would suggest to the man on the street
that the wearer's body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. He said that the
Spirit-indwelt body should be adorned in modest apparel (I Tim. 2:9-10).
Furthermore, he had secured some statistics from somewhere that prove that there is a vital relationship between miniskirts
and the increase of rape in
I suppose it is the truth
that hurts. That's why I hurried out of church this morning. I saw several
other miniskirts slinking out, too.
I guess what we really need
is to be converted into something more modest.
______________________